I can’t count how many times I have given up on a desire or goal due to frustration. I can remember so many instances in my life, right when it got too much, I gave up and quit. I’ve done this in relationships. I’ve done this with jobs. I’ve done this with desires. I am sure there are a ton of situations, or one now, that you are contemplating to give up on; or already have given up. Anytime we find ourselves “giving up”, we usually are frustrated, upset and just plain over it. Over the struggles. Over the disappointments. Over hoping for a better outcome.
Maybe it’s a desire you have asked God about several times. Whether a new job, or a mate, you have found yourself for years asking for something to change; and it has not.
Maybe it’s a change in financial situations. You try your best to save money and keep a tight budget. But, somehow, each month something comes up that causes you to get in even more debt and you feel like, “What’s the point?”.
Maybe it’s a relationship. You’ve tried and tried to work on yourself and your relationship; but still, things are exactly the same, and maybe, even worse.
What is going on? Why aren’t things changing?
When You Feel Like God Isn’t There
I experienced a similar situation in my marriage. We went through a really rough period while my husband was in school for his doctorate and our first year of marriage. It was tough. So tough. I tried everything. He tried everything. We counseled. Tried small groups. Everything you can think of to help. We just couldn’t do it anymore, and sadly; we separated for some time. Ironically, during this separation a lot of things shifted. My husband finished school and got his dream job. God revealed a lot to me about my ministry and things I needed to change. God worked on us both spiritually. Things shifted entirely. We later reconciled and our marriage is everything I prayed for and more! Everything. What’s funny, is that this all happened right when I wanted to totally give up. Catch that; right when I wanted to totally give up.
“We are all on our way somewhere. We’ll get there if we just keep going.” Barbara J.
This situation made me think back to other areas of my life that maybe I gave up right when I should have kept pushing. Maybe I should have kept going and remembered why I started in the first place. But, how can you keep going when it gets tough? What can keep you pushing forward when you are ready to end the game? How can you view your situation from a different perspective?
Here are some things I’ve learned and things I hope will help you not give up.
Maybe the Situation Doesn’t Need To Change
Looking back at some frustrating times in my life, I remember how my prayers were to God. “God, please change my husband.” “Lord, please give me a job with better pay.” “God, please give me another place to work so I’m not so stressed.” “Lord, please bring me a spouse so I won’t sin against you.” Notice a pattern? All of my prayers were focused on the external and not the internal. Many times, we need to adjust our prayers. It seems pretty common that people assume their problem is outside of themselves. I want you to really think about the situation you are in currently. Is there something you can adjust in your prayers that could deal with the situation? For instance, instead of praying to get paid more, maybe ask God to show you where you can adjust in your finances and where you are not spending wisely. Or, maybe instead of asking for a mate to cure your loneliness, ask God to fill your heart with His love and spirit so you are complete in Him and seek a spouse only as a compliment to your life. Or, maybe instead of asking Him to move you to a different job, ask Him to help you have patience with those you work with now. Only you are aware of your situation. See where you may need to adjust your prayers.
Maybe You Are Being Pruned
I have asked God for help in some situations that He changed immediately. I mean within hours the situation would change or the answer would come. Then, there are other prayers that I am still waiting on an answer. I started wondering, “Why are some of my prayers quickly answered while others are not?” I mean, He is the same God, right? He says He is the same yesterday, today and forevermore. He is the same God that answered me before, so where is He now? The more this occurred I asked God to give me understanding in these areas as well as peace in the areas I did not understand.
Eventually, I realized that some prayers take longer because:
- I may be suffering for the saving of someone else. My suffering will be a testimony to someone else and I am being used as a vessel to save many lives (Genesis 50:20, Romans 8:18-31).
- God is pruning something that needs to be released from me. Pruning is hurtful. When a bush is trimmed; I am sure it’s painful. However, that refining process brings out something beautiful. Trust the refinery God is using. Some things we cannot receive until we have been changed.
- Some prayers take more time to answer and are a process. Some things you are asking for require multiple people to be involved, has to occur at a certain time, and a place prepared. It’s like if you asked your mom for a birthday party and expect it to be ready by that evening. You gave her no time to truly prepare it the way you desire and deserve. Give God time to give you exactly what you are asking for and more. Many times, you being pruned, is apart of the process.
Maybe You Are Close
It seems in my life , when I was close to seeing the answer to my prayer; things got harder. Debts built up. Marriage seemed impossible. Health seemed to decline. It’s as if the total opposite of what I was praying for was happening. As if someone was out to make it harder for me and question God. Hmm, now who would do that? The enemy. The enemy loves to put pressure on God’s children and make them question God’s promises for them. He is the father of lies (John 8:44). He enjoys coming against you to deny the truth. Don’t fall for it! No weapon formed against you will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). You will see God’s promises. You will get through this situation. Right when you want to give up; push even harder!
Right now, I know you probably feel hopeless. You feel like it isn’t going to change and it’s pointless to keep trying. Do you truly believe that your God won’t come through for you? This is the same God who created the Earth just for you. This is the same God who created you with a purpose. This is the same God who brought you through before! I am telling you from experience, God is going to come through for you! When you find yourself wanting to give up; dig even harder. Dig into your Word. Dig into Worship. Dig into Prayer. Ask God for strength to keep pushing. He promises us that where we are weak He makes us strong (2 Corinthians 12: 9-11).
I cannot wait to hear the day that you see God come through for you. I know He will. Not only will it be everything you prayed for; but even better!
Ephesians 3: 20-21 “Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us...”
Galations 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”